Photo Credit: Alanna Story
Hello my dear friends! Alanna here, and I am about to get really REAL with you all this beautiful sabbath day! Once a month we, here at two sisters and a story, want to share what’s going on in our minds and in our lives to hopefully help uplift and inspire you. We also want to help you get to know us for the people we are and for you to see that there are REAL people and feelings behind our blog.
So the other day I was on a plane heading to visit my siblings when I got to chatting with the guy next to me. As you stay at home parents know, you don’t get to be around a lot of adult interactions, so I took the opportunity to talk everyone that sat next to me. I proceeded to talk this guy’s ear off. I found out he is a skier and he is super good at it. I then dug a little deeper and found out that he has traveled around the world skiing. I then pried a little bit more and found out he is in multiple magazines and was up for a prestigious award within the skiing world. My mind was blown! I thought, WOW! How awesome is that, he had followed his dreams and it was paying off for him big time.
It then got me thinking about my own life and all the “What if’s.” You know, those moments where you think “what if I would’ve taken that job opportunity?” Or the “what if I would’ve gotten married a few years later, or sooner?” Or “What if I went to college or a different college for that matter?” It might have been because I recently turned 30 and was having a mid-life crisis, but it got me thinking about my own life. I really started thinking about all the possibilities in my life and how much different it would’ve been if I had finished college and followed the career path I dreamt of.
During my trip I went on a few adventures such as: hiking, rock climbing, eating at restaurants with out screaming kids, and a piece of my 20-year-old self came out. I had almost forgotten that there is still an adventurous person inside me. I’ve been so busy serving and helping others that I forgot about her. I so longed for that girl again and a piece of me even mourned that that wasn’t technically me anymore. For a brief moment, I wanted so desperately to be her again . The selfish part of me was angry, I kept replaying my life and all the “what if’s”. I could’ve been so great at so many different things.
Thinking about all the “what if’s” kinda put me in the dumps. I felt like I had failed myself.
After a few days of sulking and feeling bad for myself, I looked back up and into reality. I started looking at my kids giggling, then screaming, being super sweet, then crazy. I started looking at my incredibly supportive husband and my heart couldn’t help but be so full of love for him and my children. I realized the path I was lead on was so much greater than the one I thought I wanted to be on.
How awesome is it that I not only get to still fulfill certain dreams and goals of my own but I now get to watch my own children do the same thing. And if my boys have any huge dreams, you better believe I will do my very best to help them spread their wings and fly.
In all reality my ideal dream in life was to be a mom, not JUST a mom but a great mom like my mother. A mother that my kids will look back on and remember as being a bit crazy, fun, loving, supportive, kind, a listener, and one to be there for them no matter the circumstance. Yes, I had other dreams and goals but being their mom and a wife is my ultimate goal on my bucket list. I hope they always know that.
For those of you going through your “what if” days, keep your chin up cause your what ifs are great but your now a days can be even better, you just have to look up.
Alanna, Natalie & Lyndsie